feeling better, i guess. (skip lagi, not important)

So.. I am still wondering why but at least what I did and had yesterday made up a bit of my day.

 

Ikan is gone tho. Sangat jarang both of us being separated like this for a long time. Selamba je nengok nannoor dok bintulu sebulan. OMG! I cant. Don’t think so..

 

Anyway, balik from keje yesterday ikan said some nice things. (1)

Balik, we singgah kat kedai segi jap beli sayur- I went wild~ ikan usually does the grocery shopping. Tapi yesterday since I wanted to cook for him, I went in. I came out with lots of vegs which come to think of, sapa lah nak makan… tinggal aku je yg makan sayur.. hmm..  (2)

Then, after maghrib, I cooked him dinner, even balik kire lambat yesterday.. I managed to cook 6 dishes everyone! Huuhuhu… selalu 3 at most. I’m so proud of myself. Terasa ade skil mak seremban plak. Heheh masak laju. (ok, x laju mana pun… we end up dining at 10!) heheheh (3)

Our lauk?

1-       Labu gulai lemak

2-       Udang masak tomato

3-       Ayam goreng kicap fusion Aisyah

4-       Terung goreng berlada

5-       Sawi goreng

6-       Ikan tenggiri goreng (for the kids)

 

Then, siap kemas2 dapur and basuh + ampai baju. Setel! (4)

 

Oklah. Terasa productive memang motivating.

 

Kalau we had some ‘loving’ last nite, mesti last nite jadi the best nite ever. Hahahahah. Ish ish ish ;)

 

And then, this morning, I woke up at 4.30 am to sahur. (…5)

 

Nice~

nothing super. u may skip from reading.

Where’s my super duper? I lost it suddenly. I’m feeling blue. I myself am not sure of the cause…

 

Was it because ikan’s going away?

Was it last nite?

Is it my pregnancy?

Not enough sleep?

Friends?

Money?

My previous dream?

Books I read lately?

Work?

 

Owhhh.. sounds so awful! Im attracting negative vibes and I sure don’t like it. I don’t even like myself today. I don’t feel wonderful. Even in prayers I feel this sorrow.

Ya Allah! What has come over me? I know You take care of me. Please give me happiness. Amin.

 

I have an idea why actually.. but too afraid to admit it. It was being talked over- over and over again. I thot I took it well, never to repeat this feeling/ doubt. But why does it comes to me in the most inconvenient time?

 

 

kasih x terungkap... as expected

I finished the malay book last Friday and what can I say.. as expected.

 

1-       Jalan cerita memang suam and over the top. I don’t know… whether its only me or does this really happen, or possibility of happening? Kawen senyap2 from the rest of the world especially from the guy’s parents. Hello??? Mentua laki la yg patut minta diredhai dulu, kan? Anyway.. moving on..  kawen time study kat overseas, the heroine pregnant and lived all alone… and ade another guy (who loved her dearly) ‘tolong’ jaga her and the baby…..??? really? That saint? I don’t buy it. Lagi pun, cam x aci 1 girl but managed to steal many good male hearts, even when she is already married? C’mon! da kawen da la.. you cant rely on other guy’s affection blab la bla…

2-       Heroine (Khairina)- lembik gile minah ni. You take a risk, live it on ur own.. cam budak yg x fakir panjang.. no wonder all disaster comes falling on your lap. X leh terima.

3-       Hero (Ikhwan)- lagi aku x leh terima. Wtf? Kawen rahsia2 pastu tinggalkan bini (yg u shud already suspected she’s pregnant..) and even konon missed her sooo demn much, only managed to call her once in a while?? What are you? Demented? Ingat die gefren ko? Ishhh.. and, the character- the author didn’t make him seem to dependant upon. Sekadar menyelamatkan his family by marrying an heiress… ko x leh cari keje yg better ke? Actually, towards the end pun, as tho he is living on the riches of his 2^nd wife. Definitely not the kind of guy I wud dream of. At least cari kerjaya sendiri la wei.

4-       HEA? Not so much. Boy, there’s a lot of things I don’t get in this story.. even some wud say the villain (Zurin) got what she deserved for.. but I don’t buy any of it. There’s so many wrong things going on in this book that I don’t find the happy ending to that happy. Zurin pergi hospital sakit jiwa. Seriously? That’s it? No remorse, no confession no nothing?

 

Arghhhhh what a week! Sib baik along the week I read ‘And then he kissed her.’ Steamy stuff this one. But a funny and entertaining one that is! And I always love female with knowledge. Loved their conversation.. and really loved their confession- esp when he realized he’s already in love with her. Very light yet strongly entertaining. Sapa nak baca, let me know. I have the softcopy.

 

 

The rest of my week- da dapat the recipes I wanted. nak cari time nak buat jek. Bought RW and O&A but will start reading this weekend. Starting ‘The Bride’ by Julie Garwood plak.

Ooooo.. I’m missing ikan already! (and he is only going not until this Thursday!)

 

 

 

projects for my July~

So.. I have this plan.. sort of. Tang where to find the time to do it lain kira.. although I plan to at least accomplish them by end the month…

 

Plan 1- (jangan gelak!) Apam gula hangus

Last week or was it last 2 weeks.. nevermind… I bought this apam gula hangus from Kak Intan- the same nasi goreng/ nasi lemak  Kak Intan, and rather than my usual additional of kuih kasui and cucuq badak, I took this apam gula hangus. I don’t know why… but I was never attracted to this kuih before (ok, ikan will say that I never try anything that is out from my ordinary yeah yeah..what ever darling!). but I guess I was in my ‘trying’ mood and took it. Waahh. I liked it! Heheh gediknye!

Anyway, I plan to search for the simplest yet yummiest recipe of the thing within this week, and hopefully make ‘em before ikan goes off next week. Chewahhhh berangan! Hope its easy to make.

 

Plan 2- Sosej balut roti

Cam teringin nak kasi this sort of makanan untuk bekal aqish. FYI, aqish’s food is very simple. Eg- sossej KOSONG, nasi putih/ nasi lemak KOSONG, ayam goreng SAJA, nugget etc.

So, I would like to make it a bit more fun by preparing her sausage rolls ke.. and also, I used to like it.. might like it again, kalau home made… hmm..

Ikan is with me on this. He’s very terre in terms of bakings and breads etc.

 

Plan 3- Books: Another 2 of my last JM- Remember When & Once and Always

Since ikan is going outstation for the whole next week, I think I’ll read them next week lah. Occupying my lonely nights ahahahahahahah gedik lagi!

I’ll buy them tomorrow. There. Settle part 1.

 

Plan 4- Books: Baca buku-novel melayu

I must say.. this gives me the goosebumps. I am not trying to be berlagak atau poyo dgn not wanting to read malay books, cume kurang exposure and pengaruh kot.

Well, I took a gamble last Friday (book fair by Utusan Publishing rasanya…) at Hg Tuah monorail lagi.. and bought ‘Kasih tak terungkap’. I hope it does not disappoint me.

I’ve read malay novels during kat SMAP dulu, kire satu zaman kitorng baca JM and Sidney Sheldon dulu aa… some are great, some (and most of them) disappointing. Few things that bug me were:

• Jalan cerita suam2..
• Not so much of a HEA ending. Selalu ade je melibatkan orang baik yang mati.
• Toooo poetic. Kekadang I cant grasp the story sebab ayat bunga2 giler.. some of the words I don’t understand. In English, you can google.. kalau malay.. eh.. leh ke?
• Some principles of the characters tu goes against my own. Kalau mat Salleh, I don’t mind sgt sbb its their culture. Lantaklah. Contohnye, kalau la the hero and heroine beriye ikutkan cinta, belakangkan their parents.. automatically I have a negative perception towards the malay characters. No matter how in love they are. I know, I know.. these are fictions.. but still…

 

Well, enough of that. I haven’t had a lot of exposure yet and I’m thinking about all this.

Anyway, the book is 702 pages. Hope to finish it by this week. X leh spill to next week! Hehehe got other plans, as mentioned ;)  

 

Ok. Cukup 4 projects for the rest of my July. Wish me luck!

 

 

 

books, i'm beginning to love them!

Since me having such fun reading nowadays, I got myself joining this goodreads.com to basically know what books are good to read, and to read book reviews. Its such a nice place to pacify my ‘sayangnya- nak- lepaskan-buku-ni’ feeling.

 

After like a month I guess, I searched for any Malaysian groups- which I did and baru je start to follow..

i viewed the member’s profile, just for curiosity and learning what type of books they read.. there’s this girl, she read 1300+ books already. Gile aa. KAGUM!

There’s this guy pulak, he reads a lot too.. and he writes his reviews- excellently! Loved it! Terpengaruh nak baca the books he reviewed. He stated that he doesn’t read romance (what else is new?- for every guy, kan?).. honestly, I don’t see myself only reading romance novels, even tho my books I read are nearly all romances. You give me a nice book, I will sure to read it.

Well, anyway, I think I’d like to follow his blog http://themalaysianreader.com/ - and especially his reviews. English die best. And funny. Cume, I’m not into the buying online books yet unlike these people.. (well, except for the secret…) Maybe because I haven’t tried it yet?

I now have a tinie winie understanding of the feeling those GR members that are addicted to buying books. Aku rase I have to have some sort of super power je x nak gi MPH kat crown plaza tu (because I haven’t bought Remember When and Once & Always yet..) tu belum lagi addicted to other authors lagi tu.

 

Don’t we live in a nice world? The world is beautiful!

 

 

perutku lagi~

So, I couldn’t wait until next Tuesday for my monthly visit with my gynae- Dr Raja Ju*aidah.

[can I selit one thing here… its about the history of Dr Raja. She’s a gynae in Columbia asia and only she has night clinics (O&G of course). I decided to not to go to Dr Intan in Seremban- sebab is far and she’s too busy for any drop in patients, if I had to. Anyway, during the search of a suitable gynae for me-  night/ weekend clinics & pompuan islam, let’s just say that we (me and ikan) had a BIG fight over this. At the time when he suggested Dr Raja, he made me believe- dgn sungguh confident sekali! That this Dr Raja is some Indian Male gynae. That kunonnye this is my only choice for a night clinic gynae. Male, Indian some more.. “Yang ada Dr Raja (penuh baku sebutan suamiku ini). Laki india.. tu je ada” and I was offended that he would suggest such to me knowing that I want a FEMALE muslim for someone to look at my vajayjay. Gishh darling! We fought like hell..

Then, I went to Columbia myself during the day (mc le kirenye ni).. when I was having my week long of bleeding. I asked the receptionist to refer me to a female O&G. Malas nak sebut islam, nanti takut ade kata aku racist plak hehhe.. anyway, mamat kat counter tu pun gave me- “is Dr Raja Ju*aidah ok with you maam?”. I think I smiled. Cause, I don’t think there’s a possibility that this Dr Raja and Dr Raja (ikan’s version) are 2 different persons…

Penat je gaduh. If only my dearest ikan further asked the receptionist Dr Raja’s full name… for the record, ikan insisted that the fault be the receptionist he spoke over the phone, for not giving him the doctor’s full name and for pronouncing it with baku- Raja.

So, that’s how Dr Raja became my gynae this pregnancy… J still gives me a smile…]

 

Okay, back to my original story- I told her that im having the C for 1 week now and its bugging the hell out of me. I gave her the folax which the GP gave me and she, frowned and to my satisfaction, she too kutuk the GP saying that I shouldn’t go to an inexperience GP. Hehehe suke!.

Anyway, she gave me 2 kinds of meds- one to solve my current problem and the other for avoiding re-occurrence. Balik umah- walaaaahhhh suke. But the act of inserting something through ur anal is not anything pleasant at all! Nangis aku! (cant imagine those who you know what se*ually…)

Im just saying- im all relieved now J J J

 

And then, Dr kate lagi, that I don’t have to bother what I eat affecting the baby.. not until I am 30 weeks I should be monitoring and controlling as by then the baby will absorb whatever I eat. Wuhuuuuuu! I can indulge myself with chocolate cakes and chocs and sweets. Ok lah, just have to watch out for my own body becoming bigger but at least I can be aware kan?

Today’s plan is to bake a choc moist cake later. (ps. Aqish siap tanye whose birthday was it that I am fussying over to buy the ingredients for the cake)

(just as long my constipation comes back!) I’m gonna have so much funnnn J

 

 

 

updates- books & baby-inside-me

Books

I’ve finished this very funny sci-fi romance book recently. The book was loaned from Johanna, after I told her that I love Kingdom of Dreams sebab it was hilariously romantic. So, she gave me ‘Warrior’s Woman’ by Johanna Lindsey. Like always- this is an old book…

It was hard at first to read the book sebab at first (taking a quote from before…) I have difficulty visioning characters that are not in this era, let alone another planet.. hahahah but fortunately it wasn’t anything extra ordinaire like Avatar- the characters. They were human. The heroine a futuristic warrior and the hero a powerful and strong barbarian warrior… (and.. wealthy of course!) basically they found, fight and fell in love with each other. But the differences between the 2 worlds are definitely kelakar! Although, I don’t think this is suitable for unmarried (and young) ladies to read it as I personally would label the book as a bit of lucah. Kire macam Scary Movie. Funny as hell, but censored in a whole.  However, its not empty lucah. There is a story line behind it and I like it. No big conflict to play around with your emotions but… hmm… I better not say. What I can say is that.. the mild hatred is understandable and felt.

I don’t think I’ll be reading a lot of those any time soon. I think.

I love the female characters here, especially Martha- the free thinker computer. Kire, computer yg ade fikiran sendiri. The heroine- Tedra, I like her sebab she is untouched and knowledgeable. Not 100% submissive, but will submit with a reason and principle. The hero- I don’t seem to love him sebab afterall, he IS a barbarian- sort of. Johanna Lindsey didn’t try to make him look intelligent.. just plain very handsome and strong. Towards the end, when he poured his love to Tedra (when he thought Tedra was dying…) Nampak la ok sket. Menganggu I sket la bile the hero seemed less intelligent than the heroine. Yeah, call me conservative, lame whatever. But I personally feel that man with much more knowledge than his woman is sexy. (hik hik… I memang depend on ikan for most of my extra knowledge seeking- world affairs, politics, entertainment, medicines, food, agama.. sometimes, even my line of work. hehehe- what can I say. I see my ikan very sexy. Hehehe) btw, I think most of my friends (and you guys too…) feel the same way too. Kan?

Ooo.. btw, I once told ikan that women loves being dominated by men, don’t we not? I have a friend where long time ago, she parted with her then boyfriend because he was too of a yes-man. She end up marrying a guy, nampak cam garang tapi tampak loving and he really suit her. And all along, I thought that most woman prefer a guy that will do her bidding and stuff. Hehehe. Well, kalau ada pun pompuan cam tu, me and most of those I know does not fall in that category.

Baby-inside-me

What can I say? Or do for that matter. Im still having my C. and hating every minute of it, especially after a meal. A meal that I must and want to take tapi cant enjoy it much sebab perut and bonts x sedap.

I met with a GP and she sucked like hell. Nak jumpe gynae, I have to wait until next Tuesday for my monthly check up sbb Tuesday je die ade clinic malam. Gishh… (and, napa aku x gi last Tuesday? Because her schedule was full lah! That’s why…). But in the meantime, I’m indulging myself with masam orange juice, strawberries.. pisang x jalan. Prunes and figs aku x makan. I need something realy bad! Just to let the current ones released. Waduuhhhhh sungguh la x comfortable!

As for the baby, waaahhhh at 5 months, she is really active. Which I am very ever grateful. She’s about 10 inch now, from what I read… belum beli apa2 lagi for her. Since x 100% confirm lagi whether her or him. But for what’s it worth (sebenarnye x nak kasi harapan…) I’ll keep on calling her.. (surprisingly, if it’s a girl, da ada nama.. kalau boy, x kompem lagi.. heheh finalized je). Anyway… she is very active at night especially. But she’s silent like an adorable sporting child when im with ikan. She kicks when her sister- aqish wishes to feel her move.. how lovely. Macam aqish bakal gang up with the baby je.. lawan busyra. Hahahahah.

Best la pregnant. In these times of course… masa morning sickness and the 3^rd trimester tu, I don’t think a lot of woman feels this. Kak long and me are few of them. Kak long is in her 1^st trimester, which means all the complaints, morning sickness yg dragged to malam sickness, moody, annoyance, sleepy and fatigue giler.. heheheh. I remembered I uttered some ungrateful and selfish words last trimester. I hope Allah x take me seriously. I LOVE BEING PREGNANT.  

To all preggies out there. What a wonderful world we live in ain’t it?